I have been terrible about updating here after my few weeks in Europe but I promise to develop good habits again. I am back in New York and, dare I say it, fine!
I got back from London last Monday night. Everyone warned me it would be a nightmare. My flight from Heathrow got canceled a few days in advance and I was rebooked for an earlier flight without having to do a thing. The flight was fine, the flight attendants extra kind—I actually got my tea in a real mug. When we landed, they took our temperatures—well, at least those of us who had been in high-risk countries. That was France for me. I left a few hours before the Eiffel was shut down and a day before the cafes all closed. Basically my trip went by as planned though I narrowly missed disaster at every step. I spent my last day taking a long walk (I averaged five miles a day in Europe amazingly), ducking in and out of health food stores and pharmacies in the Montmartre area looking for immune supports. I finally found extra strength Vitamin D, echinacea throat spray, and an amazing highly concentrated black propolis that tastes heavenly. I felt calm and prepared.
Traffic in and out of JFK was very light and I got out faster than usual. As people warned me, America was looking a bit shocking. There was no traffic in New York, cars or pedestrians. It looked like a holiday or snow day.
The truth is while many panic my life looks like it usually does. For chronically ill people, esp those without a regular job like me, life under quarantine is basically like normal life. I get up, have my tea and smoothies, spend too much time on twitter in the name of catching up on the news, read and write, cobble something together for lunch, work some more, use my portable sauna and bathe, order food or make something, sleep. I don’t see a ton of people. Social isolation of this sort is basically my normal life but it intrigues me that this is so anomalous for so many people. How much more bright and full their lives must be! Maybe as it often goes for me, this is another case of my tragically low standards? Or just my lack of awareness of how normals live?
I don’t know but whatever it is currently a gift. I still feel calm. All week I had some sort of cold or allergies. I had nothing to do but tend to it. I also went to an empty studio to record my audiobook for Brown Album; the director directed me remotely.
So life goes on. The thing I am most worried about is people freaking out. When I read the panicked tweets of so many I know and respect I really worry about us. People think this is prison, this is hell, that their lives are over, that death would be better. Really? Imagine if they had to deal with chronic illness.
I don’t want to say we are lucky to know this life already, but I am relieved to feel prepared. Just like a lifetime of anxiety disorders creates calm and stability in me in times of real crisis, I realize that some of the worst things about me in bad times become the best. Or maybe that’s just another way of looking at it to, you know, survive.
I guess I continue to hold on to the belief that we will be okay.
Here are some things that entertain me and that I have currently been into:
Eve Babitz essays—I love her so much. No one captures aged party girl LA girl vibes in such a casually literary way
Run BTS episodes—I love this variety show they do. They are each a half hour and portray the beloved boy band in various competitions and games and challenges. Their reward is often snacks! It is such wholesome fun and a way you can really get to know the band members. I am on number 40something and there are 90+. You will never run out because they keep making them!
This amazing shallot pasta—I have a secret group chat and we are all obsessed with this thing. I horrified them all by not caramelizing the shallots and using marscapone instead of tomato paste but it was still good.
This excellent olive oil cake—I keep making this cake and it keeps being good
Taking walks on weird side streets—I have found plenty of deserted streets even in Queens. It’s a bit like a video game when you see someone coming from the distance and then you cross the street and keep going to keep that distancing technique. Fresh air and walks are great for your immune system.
Exercise classes online—I will never be motivated enough to do this but you should!
Making absurdly healthy smoothies with whatever you can find—I am running out of supplies so I just toss everything I can find in my morning smoothie. It is pretty ambitious: cacao powder, whey powder, hemp hearts, coconut flakes, a small amount of banana flour, cinnamon, cayenne, oat milk, ghee, elderberry syrup, honey, frozen fruits.
Sleeping a lot—I am really into sleep right now. Sleep is the most glamorous luxurious ways to make time pass.
Read every horrifying article and account on Coronavirus you can find until you short-circuit—yeah, don’t do this.
Meditate—I know, I know! But. . . we should.
Call your parents and friends—they are probably bored.
What else are you guys doing that is helping?